Under fire

Tulkinghorn seems to have boobed once ag-ain (not a ref-erence to the previous story). Last week he ran a picture (right) with the caption “Advice to die for” of a dashing young soldier in front of what he said was a “bloody great tank”. However, Edmund McMahon Turner, a press officer at Lovells, kindly contacted Tulkinghorn to inform him that he was mistaken. Edmund, you see, used to be in the army and knows a 'bloody great tank' when he sees one – and that was not one. In fact, dear reader, it was a Warrior Armoured Vehicle. Not quite as catchy but much more accurate. Tulkinghorn would like to apologise to anyone with military sensibilities that he may have offended.
Getting your tanks and Warriors muddled up is one thing, but it seems the MoD website, where Tulkinghorn found the picture of the MoD 'legal adviser', was slightly misleading. Tulkinghorn assumed the picture accompanying the spiel on the adviser's role was of that legal adviser, but the news came as a shock to one Emma Tyrer, a legal secretary at Norton Rose. She was flicking through The Lawyer when she spotted the picture – which is of her partner Lance Corporal Elgar St Marthe (great name, huh?).
As far as she was concerned, he is a BT engineer working in the London area and has never been a procurement lawyer. He is not even a full-time soldier, although St Marthe does devote most of his free time to the Territorial Army. The picture was taken during a year on attachment with the Light Infantry in Bosnia – and presumably the MoD decided to use it because St Marthe is better looking that the real legal adviser on procurement issues.
Tulkinghorn is most apologetic for mistaking Marthe for a lawyer. In future he will keep well clear of men in uniform.