Tulkinghorn: Rock chicks

Later this month, on 24 June, the legal market battle of the bands Law Rocks returns. The event – that’s so good it’s ­happening twice in as many months – will see a brand-new roster of acts step up to show off their musical chops.

But Bird & Bird, one of the bands on June’s bill, has already stolen a bit of a march. Late last month the firm’s band, Birds of Prey, warmed up for the big Law Rocks event with a charity gig of its own for Bird & Bird employees, their friends, families and clients.

Held at the world-famous Water Rats boozer in London’s Kings Cross – a virtual second home to The Lawyer’s very own in-house band The Truemen – Birds of Prey sold out of all 250 tickets, raising more than £3,200 for the firm’s charity of the year, Keep A Child Alive.

Sadly, says band member Alexander Korff, most of the group were simply too rock ’n’ roll to pose with a copy of The Lawyer. But not
so Korff himself, who proved much more malleable – something that no doubt goes down well with the band’s legions of groupies.

Hubble, bubble…

Times are hard, even at the bar, it seems. Word reached Tulkinghorn recently that expensive fizzy water has been banned over at 3
Verulam Buildings, leaving its inhabitants with no option than to nick it off their poor neighbours, Matrix.

Things are different for senior practice manager Nick Hill, though. Hill is a mara-thon runner whose tipple of choice is – you guessed it – fizzy water. He’s understood to have reached a special deal with Matrix that is keeping him in bubbles.

Is the rest of the set aware of this? They are now.

Buruma blockbuster

Tulkinghorn is thinking of joining Houthoff Buruma. Why, you ask, understandably puzzled? Tulkinghorn will tell you why.

Last week, what appeared to be a glossy straight-to-DVD thriller, titled The Game and ­complete with movie-style credits, landed on the great man’s desk. Featuring a pic of a stern-looking Chairman Mao lookalike being grilled by an equally determined westerner on its
sinister-looking cover, this was surely a pot-boiler right up Mrs T’s street.

“Nothing is what it seems,” hissed the blurb. “Everyone has their own interests to protect. And this is a family company with many skeletons in the closet…”

The words “Houthoff Buruma” got Tulkinghorn’s alarm bells ringing and, on closer inspection, the “thriller” turned out to be a snazzy example of the Dutch firm’s approach to recruitment.

“Do you have what it takes to close the deal?” barked the strapline?

Tulkinghorn believes he does and will be sending in his CV.

Hoppy helpers

More bar news. It has emerged that One Essex Court superstar Laurence Rabinowitz QC is a massive fan of TV show The Wire, with the second series apparently his favourite.

Rabinowitz is such a fan he is understood to have picked up a – in no way annoying – habit of referring to his minions and juniors as “hoppers”, the term used in the series for the teen drug-runners.

Tulkinghorn can only guess why.

Brollie folly

More from the recent Hogan Lovells inaugural press party, where one of the newly merged firm’s senior partners was overheard making this potential devastating foot-in-mouth blooper.

The partner, Tulkinghorn understands, ­suggested that on the first day of the merger there should be gifts for all of the firm’s junior staff.