Has anyone heard the one about the Pollock banana? Tulkinghorn understands that the ubiquitous Gordon Pollock QC, head of Essex Court Chambers, has been using a monkey theme in court. Tulkinghorn has it on good authority that during a summing-up in court Pollock persistently referred to his opposition counsel, Steven Gee QC (once of Essex Court then of One Essex Court and now at 4 Field Court) as a 'monkey'. Gee took understandable umbrage, objected, and the judge gave Pollock a little dressing-down. There are two versions of the following day's events. In one, Pollock arrives in court with a bunch of bananas which he simply places on the front bench and says nothing more. In the other, Pollock has a banana or two cleverly tucked away in his court dress which he keeps flashing to 'monkey' at inopportune moments in his summing-up. Tulkinghorn feels obliged to state that Mr Gee bears absolutely no resemblance to a monkey whatsoever.