Tulkinghorn is delighted to feel hip enough to know that 5 Cavendish Square is clearly the new hot spot for lawyer parties, having been invited to two soirees there in the past fortnight.

First it was Paul Hastings’ London office, where one of Tulkinghorn’s more staunch England cricket supporters found himself waging an entire £5 on the fortunes of Freddie Flintoff this winter. “Are you sure you don’t want to make it something a bit more interesting?” enquired Kathryn Brown, the firm’s Aussie corporate partner. “Okay,” said the hack, “a tenner”. Doesn’t she realise that, should England lose the Ashes, Tulkinghorn’s hack won’t be eating for a week? Next stop it was Herbert Smith and its litigators, who are always fashionable and up with the times. David Gold turned out for the party and, ever the multi-tasker, was checking the digs out ahead of his daughter’s 21st party, which is to be held at the venue in the near future. Daddy’s not invited though. Can Tulkinghorn gatecrash that one, he wonders? Murray Rosen QC was busy trying to impress hacks with tales of his glory days as night lawyer for The Times, and attempted to set the scene with a Stogie the size of a rolled-up copy of The Lawyer.

Meanwhile, head of corporate Michael Walter revealed he has a weekend house… in New Zealand. He gets there twice a year apparently. So absolutely worth it then.

Perhaps the most embarrassing tale from Herbies’ do, though, belongs to one of The Lawyer‘s own hacks: looking to get nicely schnitzled in the midst of a busy week, the intrepid hack headed straight for the cocktails – only to realise after about an hour they were actually non-alcoholic.