One of Tulkinghorn’s scribes had the delight of witnessing the annual Hokey Cokey “not-so-real” horserace at the Institute of Barristers’ Clerks ball.

Racing pundit extraordinaire and Matrix practice manager Jason Housden set the imaginary race off to a flying start, with 15 runners and one non-runner: Brand New Copier was out of action.

Last out of the blocks was Senior Clerk, carrying excess weight, with Pupil Supervisor away after Hanky Panky with Barrister’s Wife.

As they came to the stand side Barrister’s Wife was making advances on Senior Clerk, but over the second Barrister’s Wife went down with Oral Submission.

Meanwhile Graduate First Junior got to grips with Carter Impact which was catching up with Senior Clerk.

At the line, however, is was Graduate First Junior with a last surge, followed by Senior Clerk.

Phew! Lucky that doesn’t happen in real life.