Tulkinghorn: Trick or treat?

Lovells has long coveted magic circle membership and, while the firm’s not quite there yet, senior ­partner John Young has
at least come close.

Sadly for Lovells, though, that’s as in the magician’s magic circle rather than the legal one. Never one to shy away from playing pranks at the firm’s London summer party, Young wowed the troops at this year’s event by taking part in a magic show. The entertainment kicked off when a kilted Young risked flashing his fundamentals in public by ­leaping from a giant Rubik’s cube that had – ­presumably ­magically – solved itself on stage.

Given the straitened ­circumstances we all now find ourselves in, it’s no surprise to learn that Lovells had cut its budget for this year’s party. Last year it
stumped up to have the ­indefatigable Young ­suspended, lycra-clad, from the ceiling in a silver hoop for half an hour.

It’s ­probably just as well the whole ­caboodle was smaller scale this year. As Young admits: “It was very ­difficult to improve on last year, short of jumping out of a cake naked.”

Don’t worry – there’s always next year, John.

Weighty issues

Tulkinghorn, as is well known, greatly enjoys the odd tipple and is equally a fan of fine dining. Sadly, decades of this kind of indulgence have taken their toll on the great man’s once mighty frame.

It now resembles that of a saggy ­hippopotamus wandering forlornly through the bush in search of a convenient bath of mud.

Not so Peter Martyr, the lean and mean chief ­executive of Norton Rose. Martyr ­recently let one of ­Tulkinghorn’s scribes in on the secret that he weighs the same now as he did when he was 17.

“It’s fair to say I was a bit of a big lad at university, especially after I discovered beer,” he admits. “But I was always a rugby player and these days I can still fit into my uni kit.”

So Martyr is back down to his fighting weight. If only ­Tulkinghorn could say the same. Still, in a scrap, he could always just sit on his opponent.

Just beat it

Eversheds, a firm with a surprisingly superstar client base that features Sir Elton John, The ­Beatles and Jimi Hendrix (well, the great man’s estate at least) found itself on the wrong end of a rock ‘n’ roll tantrum the other day.

The London office was playing host to a music copyright-related meeting when it all got a bit heated. One of the ­delegates started using the conference room table as a drumkit to add a little weight to his point. It was none other than Dave Rowntree, making the most of the skills he gained during his years as Blur’s drummer.

Rowntree, of course, is also an aspiring solicitor, so is perfectly positioned to cause a ruck at Eversheds – although Tulkinghorn thought he preferred the cymbal life.

Seeing red

It’s no secret that colours can have pretty powerful associations. Think ‘pink’ and you think ­pound. See a ­window frame painted a deep effervescent blue and you’re immediately transported back to those halcyon Swallows and ­Amazons days of childhood holidays on Brownsea Island. Have a blast of black and images of your shameful history as your uni’s ­resident mega-goth force their way into your ­reluctant and ­embarrassed mind.

All of which makes the decision by the CMS alliance firms to turn its recent annual conference into a veritable festival of colours all the more ­curious.

What are the ­connotations of CMS Cameron McKenna ­managing partner Duncan Weston’s decision to take the stage resplendent in a pair of scarlet kecks? What does it tell us that for some unknown reason the ­German contingent was in yellow?Certainly, with the firm recently posting a 15 per cent
drop in its average profit per equity partner, this wasn’t about the green.