Summer term is over, and you can tell that half the City is demob-happy. That’s the only explanation for the absolute nonsense that is currently floating around.
For the avoidance of doubt, it’s worth reiterating that lawyers can be much, much more inventive with the actualite than journalists. At The Lawyer, we hear an extraordinary number of rumours during the course of the year, and we automatically discount at least 90 per cent of them.
Still, it’s always quite sweet to note that the stories get progressively more fantastical in mid-July. So, in an attempt to stop some of these rumours doubling back on themselves and somehow acquiring a veneer of truth, we thought we’d expose them to ridicule right here.
Below is just a selection of absurd and downright idiotic stories we’ve been told in all seriousness by grown-up lawyers who should know better.
- DLA is about to take over Landwell.
- Fifty Clifford Chance partners have been asked to swear an oath of allegiance to the firm.
- White & Case, having called off talks with another US firm, is now in merger negotiations with Simmons & Simmons.
- Two major City firms have made substantial capital calls on their diminishing number of equity partners.
- Clyde & Co is opening in Libya.
- Macfarlanes is about to take on its first ever US partner.
- A mid-sized firm in the City has banned all of its male partners from wearing moustaches or goatees.
- Latham & Watkins is in merger talks with Travers Smith Braithwaite.
- A certain managing partner at a mid-size firm recently flattened his head of corporate with one lucky punch.
- A top City firm is currently suffering from exploding furniture.
- An exceptionally high-profile partner in a magic circle firm billed only five hours last year, but everyone’s too scared to confront him.
The catch is, that two of the above are true. Can you guess which?