Going on strike

I'm sure readers will remember the poor treatment endured by our good friend Ian Rose of Watson Farley & Williams and his dog Flossy when on a stroll in Regent's Park. Flossy's cheese toy was apparently making too much noise for those cads at Theodore Goddard to concentrate on their game of softball, so they kicked up a stink and shouted at Rose and his affable four-legged friend to clear off.
At the time, Tulkinghorn blasted them for their bully-boy tactics, but it seems that softball – far from being a sport for softies, as Tulkinghorn had previously thought – actually engenders incredibly strong feelings. So perhaps Theodore Goddard was just caught up in the heat of competition. Take the bad blood still running between Allen & Overy and Freshfields after a softball match in June. A&O was thrashed 31-21, but is still complaining today, almost a month after the match. But it's not just the time-lag, it's the nature of its complaint that bemuses Tulkinghorn. The firm is bleating that the Freshfields players were all tanned and bronzed, whereas the A&O team looked like it hadn't seen daylight for years. According to A&O, this must be because its lawyers are working on mega-deals night after night, week after week, month after month, while their peers at Freshfields are out sunbathing.
This may be so, but what is more likely is that the concierge services are far superior at Freshfields. Tulkinghorn is reliably informed that an all-body sunbed is available to all associates at their desks to top up the tan without interrupting their work. In any event, A&O's softball team has done little to earn Tulkinghorn's sympathy. In another softball incident, a Freshfields ringer appeared for Lovells against A&O but was unable to finish because the poor man suffered a ruptured spleen and a broken rib during the heat of competition. There have been no allegations of foul play, but really, it's just not cricket.