Excess baggage

News has reached Tulkinghorn Towers of potentially the fattest (or perhaps ‘kilogrammically challenged’) lawyer in the world. And the winner is… well, sorry, you’ll have to guess.

Naming the sizeable fella would probably be just a little too rude, and after all he is a lawyer. Tulkinghorn would prefer to remain in business. But he doesn’t mind sharing a few clues: this adipose American, a portly senior partner at an East Coast US firm, has apparently grown so fat that he can no longer fly. That is, the corpulent one is now so outsize that he can no longer travel in aeroplanes. “He’s the size of a truck,” exclaimed one source.
Tulkinghorn surmised that perhaps Mr Arbuckle, as his chums call him, just couldn’t fit through the door of the plane, or maybe the seats were too small, but no, it’s more serious than that. Generously proportioned people everywhere beware, as you are more susceptible to deep vein thrombosis (that’s blood clots for all you carefree jet setters). So how on earth (and that’s an instruction, not an exclamation) does an international technology lawyer conduct his practice? Thank heavens for the wonder of modern telecommunications.