Tulkinghorn: Porn to be filed?

Tulkinghorn has heard some stories in his time, but this one takes the soggy biscuit.

Word reached him last week that one particularly fruity City associate has been binned for gross ­misconduct after ­downloading pornography.

So far, so stupidly ­normal. But the twist with this chap is that he was downloading the stuff at home and then bringing it into the office.

No one knows quite why, and now they never will. In his wisdom, Tulkinghorn will keep the firm’s name a closely guarded secret, but will chortle silently to ­himself each time he passes its august doors.

Bench ­warmers?

As Tulkinghorn knows only too well, sometimes the job of his underpaid and overworked scribes is simply to fill the acres of white space that loom up at them just minutes before deadline.

Armed with such ­knowledge, he takes his hat off to the editorial team at Nordic Legal Review, the mouthpiece of Finnish firm Roschier.

In case you’re yet to receive the latest edition, the back of the book is notable for its profiles of those two prominent ­Scandinavian legal minds, AC Milan striker Zlatan Ibrahimovic and former Liverpool defender Sami Hyypiä (with a spurious reference to author ­Malcolm Gladwell expertly shoehorned in).

What next? Tulkinghorn fully expects to read Harry Redknapp’s views on the Legal Services Act or Owen Hargreaves’ ­personal injury column the next time he flicks through his favourite legal rag.

Running sore

Tulkinghorn has always been a believer in the ­benefits of regular exercise. Most days he can be found virtuously trotting between the overstuffed Chesterfield where he keeps his Monte Cristos and his well-stocked wine cellar, home to a selection of vintage clarets.

Latham & Watkins ­executive committee ­member Bill Voge is, then, a man after Tulkinghorn’s own heart. Five days a week Voge can be found dragging himself out of bed and into Lycra to embark on a five-mile jog around town before heading into work to help run one of the world’s biggest firms.

But not today. Voge is currently taking it easy after hurting his leg.

“I stepped in a pothole,” he admitted, thus ­confirming the dangers of the recent daylight-saving time shift.

Motto: don’t jog in the dark. In fact, strike that. Just don’t jog.

Winning smiles

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, and this shot ­containing Flint Bishop partner Ken Dixon shaking hands with his opposite number at Robotham & Co Nigel Green proves the rule.

It also provides Tulkinghorn with a chance to play one of his favourite games – the ’guess who’s just been bought’ quiz.

See the pained smiles, tinged with just the slightest hint of relief, on the faces of the chaps on the right? And the triumphant grins and domineering body language of the chaps on the left? Then see if you can guess correctly which lawyers are from Flint Bishop, which last month acquired Robotham.