Tulkinghorn: Facing facts

The same cannot be said of a certain dapper City partner who found himself at a loose end in Kiev recently and decided to see what was on offer in terms of evening entertainment. Sadly, he didn’t get very far.

Approaching the door of one nightclub, the partner was turned away, with the bouncer citing “face control”.

“Face control?” demanded the lawyer. “But I’m sober, I’m not pulling any drunken faces.”

“Not too drunk,” came the icy response. “Too ugly.”

Bottled up

So it’s farewell to the New Zealand all-island wine-tasting champion 1985, better known as ­former Taylor Wessing managing partner Michael Frawley.

Last Monday evening saw a bunch of Frawley’s chums show up at a bar off Fetter Lane to make sure he was really going, drink a few and book a visit to his new South Island farm. Frawley, meanwhile, was already thinking about the serious things in life.

“I’ve sent my wine cellar on ahead,” he told one of Tulkinghorn’s spies. “That’s 650 bottles somewhere over the Atlantic.”

That should keep him going for a while.

Licence to spill

Tulkinghorn has been doing his best spy impression – being smug, sexist and too drunk on ­Martinis to drive a milk float, let alone an Aston ­Martin – to bring to you news of a ­nefarious plan to take over the world.

Well, it’s not so much a plan to take over the world as it is to take over construction firm Shadbolt. And not so much to take it over as it is for Clyde & Co to merge with the boutique.
But at least Clydes did get to give its plan a cool, world domination-­sounding nickname, which we can now reveal: Project Digger.

In that context ­Tulkinghorn thinks he has every right to couch the news in stale James Bond jokes.

Doctor in the house

The secret of Bristows’ ­success in building a non-contentious IT team can be revealed. As we reported last week, the firm is going all-out to hire IT stars and build itself a transactional IT practice to match the profile of its top-notch IP team.

With a bunch of lawyers having come on board recently it all looks so far, so good. But what’s the real attraction?

Tulkinghorn’s sources suggest that it is the skills of Mark Watts, the tech specialist who not only heads the team but is also a fully paid-up member of the PhD community.

Hence his nickname: ‘the Doctor’. No wonder it’s going places.

Food for thought

Guests at the London Solicitors Litigation ­Association dinner earlier this month were treated to some ‘interesting’ ­entertainment – a lengthy table quiz.

Up for grabs for the ­winners was a bottle of champagne, while the table that delivered the most ridiculous answers would also be rewarded.

It must have been quiet on the top table because the president’s guests won both awards, prompted boos from the attending guests who had each paid a handsome sum for a seat at the Law Society dinner. Now that is interesting.

Luck of the Irish

Is there no end to Arthur Cox’s talents? Or, at least, those of managing partner Pádraig Ó Ríordáin?

The lawyer has spent much of this year advising the National Asset Management Agency, the government department responsible for bailing out the banks (and providing the firm’s trainees with things to talk about in beauty pageants – see last week’s issue if you’re wondering what Tulkinghorn is on about).

But if that weren’t enough, Tulkinghorn learnt recently that Ó Ríordáin – who spent seven years living in New York’s Greenwich Village – used his time stateside to become a bosom buddy of US President Barack Obama. Well, that might be overstating it, but word is Ó Ríordáin hung out with the great man when they were at Harvard together a while back.

And last week he hosted a party for 650 “close friends” at the Royal Exchange. Sadly, not even Ó Ríordáin’s talents could inject much-needed winning ways into Ireland’s attempts to make it to the World Cup. Despite cheering the assembled crowd with a half-time update, ultimately Ireland – and Ó Ríordáin – had to admit a rare defeat.