The Lawyer Inquiry: Mary Harmey was born in London in 1971. She is a corporate finance solicitor at Norton Rose.

What was your first job?

Saturday checkout girl at Bejam, Haywards Heath.

What subject(s) did you fail at school?

None, though I was awful at physics and home economics – all that weighing and measuring I suppose.

What was your first ever salary as a lawyer?

u18,000 as a trainee at a West End firm.

What would you have done if you hadn't been a lawyer?

I would have been Kylie Minogue.

What was your most satisfying professional moment?

I was really pleased with my professional performance on the most recent takeover I was involved in, even if I say so myself.

What was your most embarrassing professional moment?

Being stopped outside work and asked whether I'd like to appear in an Always Ultra advertisement – I don't carry a bunch of balloons when I rollerblade home anymore.

What do you least like about being a lawyer?

The number of idiosyncratic primadonnas I have to deal with on a daily basis.

And the best thing about being a lawyer?

The variety of people I have met and the variety of work I have had – it's not a predictable career.

What annoys you most about clients?

Their belief that all lawyers are telepathic.

Who do you admire most, and why?

Brian Conley – the man is a comic genius.

Which famous person or historical figure would be your ideal client, and why?

Otto von Bismark – probably the best negotiator in a hostile bid situation the world will ever see.

What is your most annoying habit?

Assuming people know what I'm talking about.

What's your biggest fear?

Being found out.

How do you relax?

Lying in a hot bubble bath surrounded with candles and slugging wine.

What is your most precious possession?

My goldfish called Chicken.

Where would you most like to be right now?

In Dot's Cafe in Balham, eating a fry-up with my friends shouting and laughing as we discuss the antics of the night before.

In 10 years' time, where do you see yourself?

Ideally, having been talent-spotted on Stars in their Eyes doing a knockout version of I Should be so Lucky, I am asked to sing the Song for Europe, which I win hands down.