'tach of the Titans: the greatest moustache of the law

Some of history’s greatest figures have utilised the power of the moustache.

Albert Einstein, Lord Kitchener, Stalin, Ron Jeremy - just a handful of the great men who wore a strip of face fur that won the respect of peers and struck fear into the hearts of enemies.

And the world of law is no different.

Few lawyers dare to wear a moustache in modern Britain, however those that do can ride it to the top of the profession.

To check the progress of Team Tulkinghorn’s taches, or to sponsor
their efforts, click here.

Here is my guide to the biggest and best moustaches in law. Feel free to add your own nominations.

1) Mr Justice Peter Smith: A devastating example of ‘The Walrus’.

Against a charge of misconduct by the Office of Judicial Complaints, Smith J’s moustache stood firm, refusing to lose any of its bulk or lustre. He lost the judgement, but it was in spite of, not because of, the presence of the walrus.

2) John Young, Lovells.

Lovells senior partner John Young has always forged his own path. Whether it’s being lowered from the ceiling in a silver jumpsuit at the firm’s party or being the only person at The Lawyer awards wearing a kilt, Young likes to stand out from the crowd. His moustache says, like a wayward teenager: “You don’t know me - I’ll do what I want.”

3) David Greene, Edwin Coe.

Greene’s nose tickler is more geography teacher than Wild West pioneer but deserves a mention for the hint of menace behind its neat exterior. Would you risk igniting its twitching fury? I bloody wouldn’t.

4) David Krischer, Allen & Overy.

A trend is emerging for hirsute lawyers called David. Krischer’s is the most cheerfully worn tache of the five, hugging his mouth like a chocolate moon.

5) David Simons, Norton Rose.

Another great English ‘tache, reminiscent of those worn by policemen in the 19th Century. Simons, by contrast, is the global head of HR for an international law firm. “Each lawyer has different needs,” he told The Lawyer last year, no doubt in reference to his own need for a comb to tame the hairy beast on his upper lip.