Shorn of the head

Shrek, the renegade UK judge, has been shorn live on New Zealand television by a couple of champion Kiwi sheep-shearers. Those kind-hearted New Zealanders have now given our old judge a wool overcoat to keep him warm through the upcoming winter. Unlike the British, however, who tend to keep judges on until they are senile, the Kiwis have decided that Shrek is of little practical use. Too old even to be sold for mutton, is is understood that a career in marketing awaits the judge. Perhaps there’s a position going at Freshfields…