Separated at birth

Assistant attrition. It’s a ‘mare. How can you stop those bright, talented stars of the future walking out the door when they’ve just had enough of all-nighters and macho cultures. One method might be to get someone who’s been there who can empathise and offer some constructive help. Enter John de Forte, head of consultancy and an expert on combating assistant attrition thanks to his earlier incarnation as Grange Hill’s perma-bullied Roland Browning. Sadly, the most effective way for Roly to cope with the stress was to run away. Tulkinghorn sees a pattern emerging…