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Tulkinghorn wonders whe-ther anyone could find a more bizarre use for one’s home than criminal barrister Colin Campbell, whose half-renovated house in Clapham has been transformed into possibly the smallest theatre in the world. A dividing wall has been knocked through to make space for four actors to perform a play entitled Rooms of the House and a capacity audience of 30.‘The play, a cross between Alan Bennett’s Talking Heads and TS Eliot’s The Cocktail Party, has been written by Barry Fantoni, a Private Eye satirist described in This is London as “a jazz-playing, cartoon-drawing, play-writing polymath”. The play’s producer offered his own house first, but noise-fearing neighbours got up a petition to stop them. In stepped Campbell, who lives opposite Fantoni.‘But Campbell might just be regretting his generosity having recently left his tenancy at Desmond de Silva QC’s 2 Paper Buildings (Tulkinghorn assumes this is the same Campbell as he is the only Colin listed in the directory).‘When Tulkinghorn contacted the set he was informed rather brusquely that Campbell was no longer with chambers and was working from home. Which home, Tulkinghorn would like to ask - surely not the gutted premises currently doubling as a theatre?‘Tulkinghorn would like to issue an appeal: where is the real Colin Campbell? If this is he, please contact Tulkinghorn, if it is not, please contact Tulkinghorn.