Tulkinghorn was outraged to read in the national press on Good Friday that, of all things darts – yes darts! – has been recognised as a sport. Good God, they’ll be making ten-pin bowling an Olympic event soon.

Apparently, the British Darts Organisation compiled a dossier which informed the reader that a darts player can walk 25km during a tournament. Hardly enough to make an impression on the small hills that constitute most players’ bellies, but apparently enough to convince Sport England that throwing a little arrow at a wall should have the same status as proper sports such as rugby, rowing or running.

And who, we hear you cry, are the legal minds responsible for this abomination? Those standing on the oche taking a bow, pints in hand, belong to Hammonds (Tulkinghorn should have guessed – it wasn’t going to be Slaughters now, was it?) along with Blackstone Chambers junior Tom de la Mare. It might be a bullseye for darts, but it’s an own goal for sport.