Little League

The epic research process for The Lawyer 100 Annual Report has begun. It’s not out until September, but the reporting season is already well underway and Tulkinghorn’s mind is turning to figures.

The great man has been conducting some important research of his own, culminating in the inaugural ‘Lawyer Offspring Survey’. The results show that City partners are taking seriously the edict to go out and multiply, both in terms of billable hours and breeding. With child numbers at some firms soaring, it seems that siring children may be the latest way to prove your might in the City. And now Tulkinghorn is able to offer his own highly sophisticated profit per child (PPC) ranking for the first time ever.

Ashurst partner Ed Sparrow, Clifford Chance partner Elizabeth Knox and banking head Mark Campbell top the table, each with seven children. Knox, however, earns bonus points for having given birth to hers. One City source commented: “Respect.”

Knox aside, the only other female partner to make the table is former Slaughter and May competition star Laura Carstensen, who last year retired for lifestyle reasons. Carstensen has six children, but also earns bonus points for having given birth to each and every one.

There must be something in the water at Slaughters. A further three partners make it to the table, with Nigel Boardman, Eddie Codrington and Malcolm Nicholson all tallying six tots. It must be the purity of the all-equity partnership.

DLA Piper and Lovells both fielded candidates, with Leeds-based DLA Piper partner Tom Whelan and Lovells litigation partner Neil Mirchandani each notching up five offspring.

Some partners, however, criticised the figures, pointing out that partners who had children with more than one wife were “cheating”.

The PPC figure is calculated by dividing average profit per equity partner (PEP) by the number of children. Unsurprisingly, the Slaughters babes are the wealthiest in the City, each taking home £136,500 annually. Clifford Chance children plummet in the PPC tables, with the Knox and Campbell kids reaping a paltry £92,000 each – short of the £95,000 for each of DLA Piper’s Whelan children. Hardly enough to cover the school fees. Eversheds children, however, languish at the bottom of the table, with Leeds corporate partner David Strachan earning just £55,000 per child last year. Clearly comp-bound.

It is not yet clear whether the results will spark a competitive breeding frenzy across the City. However, with the sun now shining, Tulkinghorn, for one, lives in hope.