Freshfields – the cookie monsters

Times must be hard at Freshfields. When Tulkinghorn visited the firm's Fleet Street offices last week, he was alarmed to find that plates of biscuits in the meeting rooms had been fitted with a failsafe anti-consumption device to cut expenditure on sweet chocolate-based snacks.

Biscuit plates were covered with a tightly-pulled piece of clingfilm, a cunning psychological device to deter greedy journalists from getting their hands on the biscuits. Mrs Tulkinghorn does something similar with great effect at church coffee mornings.

Presumably, clients get the same treatment. Oh well, along with last year's cancelled Christmas dinner, it all saves money in these hard times. Tulkinghorn's only worry is that the same biscuits will still be circulating when the economy picks up in a couple of years.